I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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