i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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