Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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