im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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