I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
