ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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