you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
