i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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