Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Someone shattered a urinal.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize