from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
