Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
