Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
