After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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