hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
