Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
