This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
