I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize