Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
