Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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