Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
