It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.