do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
We have started to decorate penises.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
