I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
