do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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