Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
