I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Life is so much better after having sex.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
