Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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