i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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