Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(831): View more from California

'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason

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(831): 'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason http://tfl.nu/vr72

Replies (15) Good night (2290) Bad night (605)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like abortions should bother me more

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(724): I feel like abortions should bother me more http://tfl.nu/zn32

Replies (32) Good night (1168) Bad night (2708)
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(940): View more from Texas

I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.

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(940): I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night. http://tfl.nu/ldko

Replies (16) Good night (983) Bad night (3674)
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(226): View more from Ontario

i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.

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(226): i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much. http://tfl.nu/edmc

Replies (24) Good night (5388) Bad night (1086)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.

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(856): So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron. http://tfl.nu/ru5k

Replies (18) Good night (1672) Bad night (5515)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.

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(202): All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well. http://tfl.nu/6mn8

Replies (6) Good night (4287) Bad night (920)
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(503): View more from Oregon

One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.

(503): View more from Oregon

By 8 I mean 9.

(503): View more from Oregon

And by 9 I mean 10.

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(503): One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party. (503): By 8 I mean 9. (503): And by 9 I mean 10. http://tfl.nu/vux8

Replies (62) Good night (3452) Bad night (5184)
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(320): View more from Minnesota

In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.

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(320): In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen. http://tfl.nu/m4s0

Replies (9) Good night (3369) Bad night (754)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood

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(931): there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood http://tfl.nu/qekx

Replies (6) Good night (570) Bad night (2239)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character

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(920): He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character http://tfl.nu/qsh8

Replies (4) Good night (1659) Bad night (555)
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(516): View more from New York

Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time

(917): View more from New York City

An adult?

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(516): Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time (917): An adult? http://tfl.nu/ka62

Replies (3) Good night (1494) Bad night (469)
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(573): View more from Missouri

I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.

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(573): I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh. http://tfl.nu/ykfv

Replies (1) Good night (754) Bad night (449)
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(619): View more from California

Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats

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(619): Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats http://tfl.nu/741y

Replies (3) Good night (594) Bad night (348)
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(216): View more from Ohio

if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid

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(216): if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid http://tfl.nu/kpi9

Replies (1) Good night (676) Bad night (333)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!

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(608): I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!! http://tfl.nu/lz1z

Replies (0) Good night (700) Bad night (214)

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