Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest

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  (519): He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest http://tfl.nu/yyal
  Replies (47) Good night (1559) Bad night (5783)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.

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  (520): The world would be so much better with thought bubbles. http://tfl.nu/emrq
  Replies (9) Good night (5295) Bad night (659)
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  (818): View more from California

  she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick

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  (818): she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick http://tfl.nu/e1f8
  Replies (12) Good night (936) Bad night (4204)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.

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  (208): We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands. http://tfl.nu/sr1t
  Replies (26) Good night (6114) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...

  (1-206): View more from Washington

  He obviously understands you completely.

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  (206): He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes... (1-206): He obviously understands you completely. http://tfl.nu/r2fl
  Replies (7) Good night (4913) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.

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  (520): In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties. http://tfl.nu/3p0b
  Replies (32) Good night (7786) Bad night (1204)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"

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  (419): He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry" http://tfl.nu/v0z5
  Replies (5) Good night (2436) Bad night (1138)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.

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  (248): i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it. http://tfl.nu/5a93
  Replies (5) Good night (2388) Bad night (993)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.

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  (918): I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots. http://tfl.nu/xikz
  Replies (27) Good night (3736) Bad night (1970)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'll be there in a few.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'M COUNTING TO FEW.

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  (814): I'll be there in a few. (717): I'M COUNTING TO FEW. http://tfl.nu/nvfq
  Replies (5) Good night (1029) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now

  (1-931): View more from Tennessee

  You gays are geniuses

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  (931): I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now (1-931): You gays are geniuses http://tfl.nu/19l5
  Replies (6) Good night (1547) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.

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  (330): I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs. http://tfl.nu/5zwg
  Replies (8) Good night (570) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing

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  (416): Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress (416): Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing http://tfl.nu/buq7
  Replies (2) Good night (324) Bad night (481)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues

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  (787): come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues http://tfl.nu/x9jo
  Replies (0) Good night (544) Bad night (264)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.

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  (303): I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room. http://tfl.nu/4ego
  Replies (3) Good night (546) Bad night (170)

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