My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform