So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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