do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize