Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
