I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
are you so shy because you have an std?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize