Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize