I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
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