I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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