And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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