Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
