I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize