No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
