Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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