I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize