Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize