i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
