I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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