either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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