Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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