A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
