Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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