i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...