i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Randomize
