This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
