I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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